Please consider this a parody on human insanity- mine included. These pages sometimes seem more like rants- too much time on my hands. I hate (HATE) running for fifteen reasons but have to for the next week. So I run with earbuds in. Used to think people who did that were losing out on all that nature had to offer- birds chirping, wind through hair, blah blah blah. Reality is, where I run, all I can hear is the assholes gunning their engines unnecessarily fast up and down the hill. Earbuds rock so I can pretend I’m running through a “Dances with wolves” ecosystem, pure and pristine. Plus, reggae has a certain beat that pandora brings to my workout randomly- so far, so good. Some drivers seem to see how close they can get their car to me. Oh well, I mind my own business, not so deep in thoughts as I run. Close your eyes when you listen to this song if you want to. I just did. It’s easy to imagine half a mile going by without your knowledge while the beat regulates your feet- speeding up slightly as the tempo changes. Fists clenched as your body rhythmically and painfully thumps it’s way down the street. GREAT RUNNING SONG! This song took me part way up the hill- feet thumping on the shitty sidewalks in sync with the awesome tropical beat of reggae base. Since my body was occupied and my consciousness was kept company by the music, my subconsciousness was free to ponder upon the meaning of life! I started to recognize what bothered me about my fellow trumbullites- they throw shit out the windows of their cars. Lots of stuff. I started to realize that consumption of all types of every vice whilst driving was the biggest culprit. By far the biggest environmental criminals are the few remaining lowlife cigarette smokers who care more about the environment in their car than the environment we all wish to remain intact. They only care about themselves! Consume and toss. Consume and toss, twenty times a day. Fuck it! Who the hell are you to tell me to actually throw my discarded butts away PROPERLY??? I’ll do whatever the hell I want to! I find that it’s not actually the stereotypical “lowlife” that you would expect to see driving down the road in poor rural America. It’s rich cars, poor cars and everything inbetween. The only common denominator is that it’s SMOKERS. I run past literally hundreds of thousands of cigarette butts, like grains of sand on the beach on my effortfull journey up that hill. I’m completely 100% honest with you when I say that I have zero respect for these people, as evidenced by my outspoken hostility towards them during the entire course of my life. If they have no honor in their polluting behavior, I do not see why I have to have any for them. Not that what one person says to another has one bit of affect on the net quantity of biomass of disgusting cigarette filters that slither their way into our oceans every minute of every day. I was deep sea fishing in North Carolina fourteen years ago in the crystal clear blue waters off the coast of nags head with my extended family and my bro in law kept flicking (dispassionately) his gross filters into the water. I would watch them float on the water for a long time as the still water tugged them slowly away from my sight. As soon as one was almost out of sight another one would take its place next to the boat for me to watch again, my brain cells grinding against each other as I tried to figure out what to say to this guy to stop him from an obvious insult to something I thought everyone was aware of. Turtles eat that shit and die. Never read that? Where you been? Fish eat that shit and die, I thought to myself. They die too, never heard that? You live in a cave??? After a few hours I offered him my empty beer can, having lost a filter of my own after numerous consumptions. Being buzzed has it’s advantages! “Dave, please put those in here instead of throwing them into the ocean. Fish and turtles eat cigarette butts and die from them.” He was taken aback, insulted, hurt. We haven’t spoken since. I tried to be polite as I could be but at some point one just has to stand up for what is right in life, and there is no sugarcoating a request like that. I guess it was a price that I didn’t know I had to pay but I don’t have any regrets. At the virginal top of killington mountain one winter I got off the lift and skied towards the lodge to get food. Some guy flicked his cigarette onto the snow in front of me. Five milliseconds later I said “excuse me sir, you dropped something...” I pointed to his disgusting cigarette butt still lingering smoke around itself as it put itself out in the melting snow. The guy, taken aback by my comment, hesitated as I looked at him. I’m sure he was tempted to ignore me, but he could tell that my boldness was going to escalate if he tried. That asshole bent over and picked up his friend and the three of us made our way to the door next to the garbage can ten feet away from his crime. It was the late 70s and I was a full blown high school jock but wanted to be a hippie. Thought that if I grew my hair to shoulder length that would do the trick (it didn’t). I drove my car to an intersection where the light was red, pulling up next to another car in the process. The older guy flicked his cigarette out the window. I sat there for a moment... pissed. I said the same basic thing to him that I said to the skier, and the older guy-ww2 type guy- said “why don’t you get a haircut???” Light turned green and off we went. Now, I don’t recommend that anyone else do what I do because it’s futile. People are thoughtless. They are going to do whatever the hell they want to do, and it’s YOU who will look like the loser... at least I tried! I don’t do and say that stuff anymore but I think it, and I still have less respect for smokers now than I did before- less than zero. After smokers, drinkers are the next worst polluters.... and NOT alcohol drinkers! NOT coffee drinkers- WATER drinkers! Hypocritical health conscious earthy water drinkers. Two faced to the core. I was surprised at my discovery. Shitloads of healthy water bottles, complete with their paid water bottle deposits ignored as they flew from the fingertips into the leaves decomposing on the side of the road. Crushed so nobody can collect the $.05. Maybe the whole ones were picked up already. The most fun category of car window tossers to ponder upon is the tiny alcohol bottle consumers! It’s hilarious!!! Let’s think about this for a while- you JUST GOTTA GET YOUR FIX! “Hopefully, if I just consume a tiny bottle, my wife (or husband) won’t notice the alcohol on my breath.” I’ll get my fast tiny buzz, be on my way, and everything is cool!! Tons of ‘em, sitting there waiting for thousands of years go by until they turn into teentsy microplastic particles to poison other forms of life, oh well. So interesting wondering about the things that drive this sort of behavior! Ok, drink em (illegal) but do you gotta toss em out the window too? Only ONE coffee cup. Tons of people drink coffee on the go leading me to believe that most people do not chuck stuff out the window. If most people did, there would be a TON of coffee cups but there aren’t. Absolutely zero beer cans. Maybe because of the deposit, maybe not, who the hell knows. I’m a believer in the deposit laws though- they seem to work! Put deposits on the onesy shot bottles then. I saw one used diaper very considerately encased politely in a plastic grocery store bag so nobody would be grossed out when the parent chucked it out the window. Tied up tight! People chuck em out the window all the time in front of the nursery. These people, though less numerous than smoker-polluters, are the absolute lowest forms of life on this planet. This great song ran with me down the hill. The drummer seemed to know my pace by drumming his main beat each time my right foot hit the ground. Fantastic.
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February 2020
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